Easy steps to building up a great self esteem and self love

Do you have a low self esteem, or too much? Very few people realize that healthy self esteem comes from balancing, harmonious and loving relationships with our selves.

Are you shy, full of doubts about your appearance, action? How much time you spend worrying what other people think about you? Or you carry on an image of successful, self confident person, but deep inside you know, this is just an armouring that hides your low self esteem and unworthiness, and you look for proof and validation from outside.

Our relationships with ourselves determine all our actions and relationships with others and life.

You can ask any person, if one loves oneself- the probable answer is,”Oh, yes, I do.” – as everyone understands on some degree or another that this is good to love oneself or,to respect, at least.

...but ask yourself again and be honest...Do you ALWAYS accept yourself unconditionally- never judge, never criticize, never compromise? Is it a normal for you put yourself down with negative comments?

For me this lesson to learn how to like and love myself was the most difficult one. I’m still in the process of knowing myself – there are many layers of our beings that are not accessible at a time. I would like to share with you some exercises that helped me a lot on my process of gaining my healthy self esteem and self confidence. I strongly believe that nobody is able to live one’s highest potential without knowing, loving and accepting oneself truly and completely. Nobody is perfect, and we are here to express our differences and appreciate them.

Many different people think about me in different ways. But am I really what they think about me? The most important thing is WHAT I think about myself, and even more important thing is HOW I think and feel about myself.

Healty self esteem gives you a power to be secure in yourself,and ability to recognise and appreciate your strong points, despite your week points which you accept without judgment.

Let’s get started...

The first thing we need to do is to have a faith, intention and deep desire to learn to love ourselves. When Jesus stated,” Love yourself as you would love your neighbour”, he meant -“Love yourself first, and then you are able to love your neighbour, not all the way around as we do- with that false sense of responsibility to put another before self.

How you can start a process of developing self love and self esteem.

As soon as you’ve finished, it’s time to reverse the process into a positive experience and boost your self esteem.

Start a new list now- what you already like about yourself, write it down and feel appreciation for being a person you are. Think about what traits and characters you would like to develop and what ACTIONS you would need to do that help you to be a person you would like to be; write down your deepest desires, dreams.

Write a love letter to yourself. You don’t need to think about what you are writing about. This is actually letter from your Higher Self; you will get the meaning later when you read it.

Here I’m giving you some examples what I had in my list of actions to build up my self esteem.

1. I was not confident about my body so, to gain self confidence and befriend my body I walked around the house nude (when nobody was home), looking in the mirror I tried to feel appreciation. At first that was really hard to feel myself confident inside my own body; now this is really fun and joy- to enjoy myself. This is my favourite exercise in the morning- to feel my body, to love it, to appreciate its beauty and health.

2. From time to time I spoil myself with a sensual bath- candles, soft music, and sensual oil. I usually touch every single part of my body –from toes to the head- and say, “Thank you for serving me so good”. Sometimes after taking a bath I dance the dance of Goddess (no matter how you express it) that helps my feminine nature to flourish.

3. I remember when I was five-six years old I used to look at myself in the mirror and think,” I’m so beautiful, I love myself so much!”. Sadly to say, late on I learnt to be ashamed of myself. One exercise helped me to connect myself to myself- gazing into your own eyes can be very difficult for some people. When you are looking into your own eyes in the mirror – you are looking at your Soul. Say, “I love you, I forgive you, you are beautiful”.

4. On my computer desktop I created a pictures collage from my early childhood with words on it, “Smile! I love you little Lana!” That helped me to heal my “inner child”.

5. I like to do favours to people- hold on the door for the person behind me, let in the car to get on the lane, and many other “little” things- to coworkers, strangers, friends. All you need is just notice people around and not to be self-centered. Sometimes just little smile can lift somebody up, and you too- you feel great about yourself that you are a good person.

At the beginning this process of transformation of your self esteem may seem like hard work, later when you get accustomed to it, you will bring more fun and creativity into it. You can decide to do unexpected things that you would never dare to do before. You will tap into a creative process of life that is out of habits, every day is new, you are new every day.